Staying friends with your ex – good or bad?

When your ex is all in your business and you are all in theirs then they are not your ex. When you are dating someone else exclusively and get more text or phone calls or emails from your ex than your partner, staying friends with your ex is bad or it just means you are not into the guy/gal you are dating and are more into your ex. Either get over him/her or get back with them. It is that simple.

If your ex is intruding on your life and you don't want them to, cut off all communication. Their first instinct will be to bug you even more initially, just ignore them and eventually they will get the message because you are no longer responding. You may even have to block their number from dialing yours or unfriend or unfollow them. It is okay, that does not make you a biatch or an a-hole – you are simply taking care of yourself and your sanity.

If you have children in common with your ex, and your ex is reasonable such that you can have a healthy friendship with them for the sake of the children, it is a good idea to be friends and on good terms with your ex. Your children are watching and learning how you interact with each other–Your children may repeat what they learned by watching you – and often do when they start dating and looking for love so it is critical you maintain a healthy, positive environment for them when it relates to your ex. Now, having said that, there are valid situations where you may not want your children to have any contact with you ex such as abuse, addiction, or other unhealthy scenario that you know is not a good influence on your kids.

One more thing, if you are in a relationship and your partner does not like or is uncomfortable with your relationship with your ex, decide if your ex or your current relationship is more important and behave accordingly. Nuff said?

Not sure if staying friends with your ex is working for you or not? Contact Dr. Dar to get your answers now.

WCCB Rising

Story Created: Jun 25, 2010 at 9:24 AM EDT
Story Updated: Jun 25, 2010 at 9:24 AM EDT

CHARLOTTE, NC– You broke off the relationship, but you're still close friends with your ex. Can maintaining this friendly status take a toll on your new romantic relationship? FNR's Dr. Dar explains.